Dissociation is a common experience for those who have experienced trauma. Dissociation can manifest in many ways, from feeling numb and disconnected from one's thoughts or feelings to losing touch with reality entirely. For friends and family members, witnessing someone dissociating can be frightening and confusing. But there are ways you can help.
Dissociation is a coping mechanism the brain uses to protect itself from overwhelming stress or trauma. It's a way of disconnecting from reality to avoid feeling the full effects of a traumatic experience. During dissociation, a person may feel like they're watching themselves from afar, like they're in a dream state, or like they're not really in their body. It can be an unsettling and confusing experience, both for the person dissociating and anyone around them.
If you suspect someone you know is dissociating, there are a few things you can do to help them:
It's important to stay calm and grounded when someone is dissociating. Don't panic or try to "snap them out of it." This will only make the person more anxious and disoriented. Instead, stay calm and present, and remind them that they're safe and not alone.
Try to connect with the person in the present moment. Encourage them to focus on their surroundings and the sensations in their body. You can ask them to describe what they see, hear, smell, taste, and feel. This can help bring them back to reality.
Offer words of reassurance and comfort. Let them know that you're there for them and that they're not alone. You can say things like, "I'm here with you," or "I'm not going anywhere."
Dissociation can last for a few minutes or several hours. It's important to be patient and understanding. Don't pressure the person to "snap out of it" or rush the process. Give them time and space to come back to reality on their own terms.
There are a few things that you shouldn't do when someone is dissociating:
Don't judge or minimize the person's experience. Dissociation is a real and valid coping mechanism for those who have experienced trauma. It's not a sign of weakness or an attempt to get attention.
Don't try to snap the person out of their dissociative state. This can be overwhelming and frightening for them. Instead, offer words of comfort and reassurance, and give them time and space to come back to reality on their own terms.
Don't touch the person without their permission. Touch can be triggering for some people, especially if they're dissociating. Always ask before touching someone, and respect their boundaries.
Signs of dissociation can include zoning out, staring blankly, feeling detached from reality, or experiencing memory loss. The person may seem distant or unresponsive.
Dissociation itself is not dangerous, but it can be a symptom of underlying trauma or mental health issues. It's important to seek professional help if dissociation is a recurring issue.
While you can't prevent dissociation entirely, there are things you can do to help reduce the likelihood of it occurring. These include practicing self-care, seeking therapy for underlying trauma or mental health issues, and creating a safe and supportive environment.
The best way to support someone who dissociates regularly is to be patient, understanding, and non-judgmental. Encourage them to seek professional help, and offer to be there for them whenever they need support or someone to talk to.
